The 5 Most Epic One Man Rampages In the History Of War

War movies can be great, don’t get me wrong, but they can also be a right snooze-fest. When it’s a one Rambo-like geyser ploughing down an entire army with a pull of his trigger finger, only to backflip over land mines and drop kick the main bad guy in the head. I just don’t buy it.

Having said that, I haven’t got the minerals for war, and some folks have in abundance; some people turn full beast mode when faced with danger. When pushed too far, I would shut down completely, cry or rail against the unjust God that inflicted such dire times upon me. Fortunately for our liberty, some men when they reach their breaking points as human beings, opt instead to channel hellfire through their hands and bring the entire world crashing down around them. Let’s meet the top 5.

5. Piru Singh screams the Pakistani Army to death

In 1947, the newly independent states of Pakistan and India began the first of many wars over the province of Kashmir, seeking control of the world’s supply of sweaters and casual throws. In the summer of 1948, the AZN (the Pakistani army in Kashmir) attacked the village of Tithwal and surrounded the area with securely placed machine-gun nests.

Company Havildar (Sergeant) Major Singh was part of the Rajaputana Rifles, a troop ordered to retake the mountain ridges now occupied by the AZN. However, AZN troops knew the area well and set up a death funnel through a narrow mountain pass. The Indian infantry stormed up the path and was predictably cut to pieces. They suffered over 50% casualties.

Enter Major “Beast Mode” Singh, he charged up alone toward the AZN position. The rest of his unit (around 10 men) provided covering fire. He somehow made it all the way up the path while bellowing “Raja Ramchandra Ki Jai” — despite having grenade explosions tear off most of his clothes. At the top, he jumped into a machine-gun nest and bayoneted all three occupants.

When Singh realised that all the men who had been covering him now lay dead or dying, he hit the proverbial roof, but tragically, he had just run out of bullets. Undeterred, he started hurling grenades and charging into enemy trenches again. He bayoneted two more soldiers before a grenade explosion tore off half his face, which he found mildly inconvenient at best.

Now bleeding from multiple shrapnel wounds and half blind with his own blood, he charged the second machine-gun nest and threw a grenade into it, just as a bullet struck him in the head and killed him. As he fell, the grenade exploded, taking out the nest and winning the battle… hero.

4. Thomas Alfred “Todger” Jones doesn’t need backup

Yep, he was nicknamed “Todger” for his hefty wang, and we assume he had boulder-sized balls alongside it. On Sept 25, 1916, the British had captured the French village of Morval and were in the process of building trenches when a sniper opened fire on them. Several men were wounded, but when one of the younger soldiers was shot through the head and killed, Jones finally reached his Hulk breaking point.

Jones picked up his rifle and sprinted off across the muddy, open ground toward the enemy position. He was in full view of the sniper, who put one bullet through Jones’ arm while another passed through his helmet, slid down the back of his shirt and burned him all the way down to the waistband. During his mad dash he stopped and shot the sniper… as well as two members of the Kaiser’s Elite 32nd Brigade. Jones remained unharmed on his journey across the field, still completely alone, until he eventually reached the other side. The side with all the German trenches. Full of Germans.

“Todger”

Jones leaped down and shot three enemy soldiers. When he came to a dugout, he picked up a discarded grenade and flung it in. Three German soldiers came tumbling out and surrendered. Jones took one prisoner who could speak English and used him, along with a few more grenades, to get the rest of the Germans to surrender. All told, around 102 Germans came out, unarmed, with their hands in the air.

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